The divorce rate is now as close to fifty percent as it has ever been. That should tell you something about marriage. Something somewhere is going wrong. There are plenty of signs that your marriage is not as strong as it once was. You might feel as if there is never any romance or even compassion. It may be the case that you and your partner are simply not making time for one another anymore. Or, it could be that you hardly ever have sex. Although, many people will put forward the jar of beans theory here, it’s important to note that the lack of sex in a marriage can easily weaken the bond. The question you must ask is what to do when you think your marriage is failing.
Step 1: Talk To Your Partner
If you think your marriage is struggling, it’s important to talk to your partner. You shouldn’t keep your feelings bottled up inside as this will put even more strain on your relationship. However, if you have children, you should not let them know that you feel there is a problem. Talk to your partner in private about how you feel and what you think has gone wrong. It’s possible that this is all it takes to put your marriage back on track. An honest and open conversation between two people that love each other can easily provide the solution that you need. However, if you don’t feel as though you are breaking new ground, you should take some initiative.
Step 2: Put More Effort In
This won’t usually be the case of one person not putting effort into your marriage. It will be both of you. It’s important that you both make a commitment to try harder. You should, consider, regularly going on date nights together. Plan a night for just the two of you, eating out at your favourite restaurant or seeing a movie. When you have children, it can seem like there is no time for your relationship. But you should make time because that’s one of the reasons why your marriage might be faltering.
Step 3: Couples Counseling
Usually, couples counseling is where you will find the route of your problem. It’s where you will understand if your marriage can be fixed or if it’s time to let go. A couples counsellor will not commonly give up on a marriage. They will offer fixes and try to make your relationship stronger than it is. Usually, if this fails it is because either you or your partner has decided the problem is too severe. This might be a case of infidelity lasting years or a lack of feelings towards one another. At this stage, you might consider staying together but you should think about the other option carefully.
Step 4: Thinking About Divorce
Please remember that not everyone will reach this stage. As we have said, some will solve the issues through their own methods. Others will find the help of a counselor beneficial to their relationship. So, it’s important you don’t jump from thinking your marriage is failing to this drastic decision. You must try and fix it first. But, if you can’t you should have an amicable discussion about divorce. If you have a look at this divorce attorney, you’ll find all the information that you need to think about at the beginning of a divorce. Again, if you have children, it’s important to know how and why a divorce could affect them. But, that doesn’t mean you should necessarily decide not to get a divorce. It still might be the best option for you and your partner.
Step 5: Proceeding With The Divorce
If both you and your partner agree this is the best solution, you will both need legal representation. Both of you need your rights protected during the proceeding. Remember, a marriage is not just a declaration of love. It’s a legally binding contract that is ultimately broken during a divorce. There are lots of issues that come into play such as child support and finances. Both sides must feel as though they were fairly represented.
Step 6: A New Start
Once a relationship has ended you may feel like you can not take a chance with another. But you should. If you go through a divorce, it doesn’t mean that there was anything wrong with you. It just means that you and your partner ultimately were not right for one another. The reasons for this may vary, but you should not blame yourself. Instead, you should take a chance and one day you will find what we all search for. Someone who we can live the rest of our lives with together.